Yes, I've had a lot of that in my marriage, too. In fact, it's been more than a lot because I go to her with almost all of my problems or insecurities. But what you have described caused a lot of hurt in the past (I was no prince) and sometimes in the present.

Things have changed some, and primarily because I've gotten much older and learned a few things from my many mistakes. The changes are (1) I no longer stop when I hear the menopausal/"I'm too tired for this" excuses, and (2) her reaction does not affect me as much because I know the problem I'm raising is mine not hers, and in talking to her I am more often than not correcting myself. This has brought me some peace, and just as important, she now knows that she has someone who will really listen to what she has to say.